Remember way back in the 90s when McDonald’s Happy Meal toys were free and nobody cared that they “promote obesity” or whatever? When we were kids, Happy Meal toys were not only free, they were totally awesome. I remember getting more excited about the toys than the french fries (that’s a big deal because McDonald’s french fries are fabulous) and I’m sure most of you would agree with me on that. Now, Happy Meal toys cost 10 cents extra and Happy Meals are “healthy” (AKA they include apple slices). Aren’t you glad we 90s kids got to enjoy McDonald’s before the crackdown? Anyway, before Happy Meals became Unhappy Meals, these were the best free McDonald’s toys of the 90s!
Space Jam Puzzle Pieces
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First of all, anything Space Jam is awesome. Period. (P.S. did you know that the original Space Jam website is still in tact and fully functional? Hell. Yes.) When you combine the awesomeness that is Space Jam
with the cheap plastic perfection of Happy Meal toys, well, it’s as if
the heavens opened up. (Queue “ahhhh” sound and perfect ray of
sunlight.) The toys fit together like a puzzle and each one had it’s own
special moves. Challenging and entertaining, with a side of fries, yay!Tamagotchi Keychains
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Admittedly, it would’ve been a whole lot cooler if Mickey D’s had given out real
Tamagotchis in their Happy Meals, but that’s besides the point.
Tamagotchi keychains were Tamagotchis that you couldn’t play with but
were a way of totally innocently defying the rules of your school.
Remember how real Tamagotchis got banned in schools across the country
because they were too much of a distraction for us already
short-attention-span-ridden children? These looked like the real thing,
but ha! No batteries necessary.Golden Little Mermaid Toys
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First of all, I just want to say thank you to the person who left
Ursula deflated when they took this, because nobody wants to see that.
Also, why did she not get to be gold? Why did Ursula have to be blown up
in the first place? Whatever. Moving on, these were freaking awesome. I
mean, really, golden (well, not really) Little Mermaid toys
that floated? It doesn’t get much better than that. I do have to say
though, Max the dog is looking pretty creepy in fake-gold form. Hmm…Dino McChangeables
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I don’t have much to say here except “DINO MCCHANGEABLES!” Whoever
thought, “Hmm, yes. Let’s make plastic replicas of our famous McDonald’s
foods and make them TURN INTO DINOSAURS!” was a brilliant, brilliant
person to whom we owe a small awesome portion of our childhoods. I mean,
McDonald’s, and dinosaurs. You’re combining two things that every child
loves. Dino McChangeables were a win for sure.Teenie Beanie Babies
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Teenie Beanie Babies were the greatest Happy Meal toy there was, and
if you disagree, you were clearly not a 90s kid. You see, after you
collected all of the regular Beanie Babies, you could go get
tinier, cuter versions that also came with McNuggets! Stuffed animal?
Check. Delicious fake chicken? Check. Ultimate Happy Meal, right there.
As a child who had a ridiculous Beanie Baby obsession, these were right
up my alley.What were your favorite Happy Meal toys?
Great article by Surviving College
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