These Mindset Shifts Will Transform Your Life Forever

As the saying goes, football is a game of inches. For all of you football fans, you know exactly what I mean by this. Some of the biggest and most painful losses throughout the course of my football career came directly from either being a second too late, a second too soon or an inch away from a favorable outcome of the game.

Just as football is a game of inches, so is winning in life and in business. If you want to start living life on a new level, then you will need to make some crucial mindset shifts. How we think largely determines our destiny. 

The quality of our relationships, business success and happiness among so many other things boils down to our mindset. We are all talented at something, and while I think there are quite a few different variables as to why others are more successful than the next person, I strongly believe that mindset ultimately separates the best of the best from everyone else.

Here are three mindset shifts that will transform your life forever.

1. Grow through the tough times instead of just going through them.

One of the most important mindset shifts that could instantly open your life and business up to new possibilities is to grow through the tough and discouraging times of life instead of just going through them. There is nothing easy about this mindset shift, and it will take a lot of intentional effort on your part to fully execute this, but the results will end up changing your life.

I talk about this mindset shift a lot in my upcoming book, Winning Plays: A Top Athlete’s Advice For Tackling Adversity and Achieving Success, and how it completely changed my life forever. Some of the biggest failures and adversities in my life ended up becoming some of the biggest blessings and opportunities -- all because I chose to intentionally grow through them instead of just casually go through them.

2. Fuel your faith, not your fear.

We all have faith and fear to some degree, however, where it becomes a major stumbling block for most is when you fuel your fears more than they fuel your faith. Fear is normal, and even the best of the best experience it from time to time, but what they do differently is they re-channel it. When they feel fear, they face it head on by acknowledging it, and then shift their mindset to instead fuel their faith.

What you give energy to will likely manifest. When I refer to fueling your faith, I am referring to seeing yourself beyond your current circumstances and flirting with all of the possibilities for what could go right instead of paying attention to what could go wrong.

This small and simple mindset shift will not only help you get to where you want to go, but it will ignite a fire deep inside of you and help you to push through all of the discomfort you will experience along your journey. There is absolutely nothing positive that could come out of fueling your fears rather than your faith.

3. Love the process more than the outcome.

I have never met an incredibly successful entrepreneur, athlete, business executive or any other high achiever who has reached a level of greatness in their life that didn’t love the process. So many people would rather focus on the desired outcome and destination instead of savoring the process that will get them to that destination.

The obstacles, the challenges, the sleepless nights. That pathway to success is what builds champions. You don’t just put together a football team and go out on Sunday’s and win a Super Bowl. You don’t just hire employees and expect to have a thriving organization right from the get go. You don’t just come up with an idea one day and fall into fame and fortune. In all three of these scenarios, a process is required.

The best of the best absolutely love the process and journey no matter how difficult it may be at times, because they know that’s where the real value is at. Of course, you are going to get inspired, motivated and excited about the destination or end result of something that you are deeply passionate about, but believe it or not, the value is minimal there.

The growth, strength, perseverance, skill set and courage that is instilled in the greatest men and women in the world all came from the savoring the process, not from the destination or end result. If you can learn to love the process, you will give yourself a competitive advantage in life and in business, that does a whole lot more than pay you monetarily.

Matt Mayberry

7 Challenges Successful People Overcome

It’s truly fascinating how successful people approach problems. Where others see impenetrable barriers, they see challenges to embrace and obstacles to overcome.

Their confidence in the face of hardship is driven by the ability to let go of the negativity that holds so many otherwise sensible people back.

Martin Seligman at the University of Pennsylvania has studied this phenomenon more than anyone else has, and he’s found that success in life is driven by one critical distinction—whether you believe that your failures are produced by personal deficits beyond your control or that they are mistakes you can fix with effort.

Success isn’t the only thing determined by your mindset. Seligman has found much higher rates of depression in people who attribute their failures to personal deficits. Optimists fare better; they treat failure as learning experiences and believe they can do better in the future.

This success mindset requires emotional intelligence (EQ), and it’s no wonder that, among the million-plus people that TalentSmart has tested, 90% of top performers have high EQs.

Related: Misused Words That Make Smart People Look Dumb

Maintaining the success mindset isn’t easy. There are seven things, in particular, that tend to shatter it. These challenges drag people down because they appear to be barriers that cannot be overcome. Not so for successful people, as these seven challenges never hold them back.

1. Age

Age really is just a number. Successful people don’t let their age define who they are and what they are capable of. Just ask Betty White or any young, thriving entrepreneur.

I remember a professor in graduate school who told our class that we were all too young and inexperienced to do consulting work. He said we had to go work for another company for several years before we could hope to succeed as independent consultants. I was the youngest person in the class, and I sat there doing work for my consulting clients while he droned on.

Without fail, people feel compelled to tell you what you should and shouldn’t do because of your age. Don’t listen to them. Successful people certainly don’t. They follow their heart and allow their passion—not the body they’re living in—to be their guide.

“They follow their heart and allow their passion—not the body they’re living in—to be their guide.”

2. What Other People Think

When your sense of pleasure and satisfaction are derived from comparing yourself to others, you are no longer the master of your own destiny. While it’s impossible to turn off your reactions to what others think of you, you don’t have to hold up your accomplishments to anyone else’s, and you can always take people’s opinions with a grain of salt. That way, no matter what other people are thinking or doing, your self-worth comes from within.

Successful people know that caring about what other people think is a waste of time and energy. When successful people feel good about something that they’ve done, they don’t let anyone’s opinions take that away from them.

“No matter what other people think of you at any particular moment, one thing is certain—you’re never as good or bad as they say you are.”

3. Toxic People

Successful people believe in a simple notion: you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.

Just think about it—some of the most successful companies in recent history were founded by brilliant pairs. Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak of Apple lived in the same neighborhood, Bill Gates and Paul Allen of Microsoft met in prep school, and Sergey Brin and Larry Page of Google met at Stanford.

Just as great people help you to reach your full potential, toxic people drag you right down with them. Whether it's negativity, cruelty, the victim syndrome, or just plain craziness, toxic people create stress and strife that should be avoided at all costs.

If you’re unhappy with where you are in your life, just take a look around. More often than not, the people you’ve surrounded yourself with are the root of your problems.

“You’ll never reach your peak until you surround yourself with the right people.”

4. Fear

Fear is nothing more than a lingering emotion that’s fueled by your imagination. Danger is real. It’s the uncomfortable rush of adrenaline you get when you almost step in front of a bus. Fear is a choice. Successful people know this better than anyone does, so they flip fear on its head. They are addicted to the euphoric feeling they get from conquering their fears.

Don’t ever hold back in life just because you feel scared. I often hear people say, “What’s the worst thing that can happen to you? Will it kill you?” Yet, death isn’t the worst thing that can happen to you...

“The worst thing that can happen to you is allowing yourself to die inside while you’re still alive.”

Related: 50 Inspirational Quotes to Motivate You

5. Negativity

Life won’t always go the way you want it to, but when it comes down to it, you have the same 24 hours in the day as everyone else does. Successful people make their time count. Instead of complaining about how things could have been or should have been, they reflect on everything they have to be grateful for. Then they find the best solution available, tackle the problem, and move on.

When the negativity comes from someone else, successful people avoid it by setting limits and distancing themselves from it. Think of it this way:

“If the complainer were smoking, would you sit there all afternoon inhaling the second-hand smoke?”

Of course not. You’d distance yourself, and you should do the same with all negative people.

A great way to stop complainers in their tracks is to ask them how they intend to fix the problem they’re complaining about. They will either quiet down or redirect the conversation in a productive direction.

6. The Past or the Future

Like fear, the past and the future are products of your mind. No amount of guilt can change the past, and no amount of anxiety can change the future. Successful people know this, and they focus on living in the present moment. It’s impossible to reach your full potential if you’re constantly somewhere else, unable to fully embrace the reality (good or bad) of this very moment.

To live in the moment, you must do two things:

1) Accept your past. If you don’t make peace with your past, it will never leave you and it will create your future. Successful people know the only good time to look at the past is to see how far you’ve come.

2) Accept the uncertainty of the future, and don’t place unnecessary expectations upon yourself. Worry has no place in the here and now. As Mark Twain once said,

“Worrying is like paying a debt you don’t owe.”

7. The State of the World

Keep your eyes on the news for any length of time and you’ll see it’s just one endless cycle of war, violent attacks, fragile economies, failing companies, and environmental disasters. It’s easy to think the world is headed downhill fast.

And who knows? Maybe it is. But successful people don’t worry about that because they don’t get caught up in things they can’t control. Instead, they focus their energy on directing the two things that are completely within their power—their attention and their effort. They focus their attention on all the things they’re grateful for, and they look for the good that’s happening in the world. They focus their effort on doing what they can every single day to improve their own lives and the world around them, because these small steps are all it takes to make the world a better place.

“They focus their effort on doing what they can every single day to improve their own lives and the world around them...”

Bringing It All Together

Your success is driven by your mindset. With discipline and focus, you can ensure that these seven obstacles never hold you back from reaching your full potential.

Travis Bradberry

I'm a self-made millionaire, and here are the 10 best pieces of advice I can give you about money

About six months ago my wife and I decided to turn our North Georgia summer retreat into our full-time residence.

We decided to make a few changes to the property now that we would be living in it year-round.

As I was getting into my car one morning, three of the workers paused from what they were doing and stared me down.

I stopped and asked if everything was ok and one of the men said, "It's not fair. You have this beautiful home and a nice car while we are stuck doing hard labor for just a little more than minimum wage."

I approached the men and we ended up speaking about building wealth for more than an hour. I shared with them that life wasn't always this good, and at one point I was $50,000 in debt and didn't know how I would climb out of it. The men shook my hand and thanked me for sharing my insights.

Fast forward to this morning and I was again about to get into my car. A man driving a truck down the street stops in front of my house and yells, "Mr. Siebold, I took your advice and started my own company. I have five employees working for me and business is booming. My family and I are experiencing freedom like we never thought possible."

He continued, "Please share your words of wisdom with others."

So moved that this man turned his life around, I'm now going to take his advice and share the takeaways from that conversation six months ago:

1. In a free market economy, anyone can make as much money as they want.

2. Your background, highest level of education, or IQ is irrelevant when it comes to earning money.

3. The fastest way to make money is to solve a problem. The bigger the problem you solve, the more money you make.

4. Don't listen to the naysayers who tell you that life is supposed to be a struggle and that you should settle and be grateful for what you have.

5. Expect to make more money. For this one you have to think big. $100,000, $500,000, or why not $1 million?

6. Lose the fear and scarcity mindset and start seeing money for all the good things: freedom, opportunity, possibility, and abundance.

7. Being rich isn't a privilege. Being rich is a right. If you create massive value for others, you have the right to be as rich as you want.

8. Don't wait for your ship to come in. You're not going to be discovered, saved, or made rich by an outside force. If you want a lot of money, build your own ship. No one is coming to the rescue.

9. Stop worrying about running out of money and focus on how to make more. Constantly worrying about money is no way to live. Dream about money, instead.

10. Stop telling yourself that getting rich is outside of your control. The truth is that making money is an inside job.

Just like the man working at my home six months ago who was frustrated over his finances and held a grudge against the rich, you too have the power to change your financial situation around. Maybe you've been living in debt for years or maybe you've just dreamed of having more; it's all possible if you make the decision and really set your mind to it.

Steve Siebold

10 Ways to Fail at Being Your Own Boss

Whether you call yourself an entrepreneur, freelancer, self-employed or independent contractor, the fact is your dream of being your own boss is shared with a growing number of people. According to a recent survey by Freelancers Unionand Upwork (previously Elance-oDesk), 53 million Americans are self-employment. Another study by Intuit predicts that 40% of the US workforce will be freelancing by 2020.

All of those impressive stats and hopes aside, maintaining (what we’ll call) a “self-employed” career is no leisurely venture. Despite producing work of high quality, many people find themselves coming up short and, unfortunately, having to go back into a conventional job.

Self-employment comes with its fair share of hurdles, but, as with any other endeavor, failing shouldn’t stop you. As Richard Branson puts it, “The best developer of a leader is failure.” Though failures will inevitably happen in the pursuit of working for yourself, you can take steps to prepare yourself, so that you avoid as many of them as possible. Here are 10 reasons why you could fail.

Fear of Failure

Self-employment is the same as starting a new business, with just as many hurdles to clear to keep the doors open. But while some people can use fear of failure as the ultimate motivator, others succumb to the pressure and spend more energy on worrying than on planning for success.

Fear can even kill your career before it starts. So if you find yourself worrying too much, shift your attention to your career’s immediate demands instead of your projected failures. Your odds of success will increase.

Falling to the Competition

The pool of talent is growing, especially if you’re a freelancer, which makes some industries extremely competitive and difficult to get your foot in the door. Many freelancers apply to many, many job openings and never hear back. You might produce the same quality work as some of the top performers out there, but sometimes quality alone won’t be enough. You have to make an effort to stand out. 

There are many options for opening doors, including becoming a better salesperson, having better marketing or providing a unique product. If you are just starting out, you can even reach out to companies you’re familiar with and offering to do an assignment for free to prove your worth. Don’t forget about building your network too, as satisfied clients make great referral sources.

No Business Plan

Surviving a self-employed career requires more than just applying to job postings. It’s about setting a timeline of goals and finding ways to reach them. Just as with any other business, the best way to ensure success is to create a plan for your business. This will allow you to strategize and understand your objectives. If you have a clear vision of where you want to be, you’ll be able to recognize, tackle and move on from any failures that may occur.

Lack of Publicity

Your personal brand is your best marketing tool, and it’s your responsibility to build it up. As you know, there is no sales or marketing department that will promote your work. Though you may want to devote your time exclusively to your specialty, you also need to focus almost as much energy on making yourself known.

A cost-effective way to promote your personal brand is to create a blog or website to showcase your portfolio. Using social media sites like LinkedIn or Facebook can help you promote your product to the world. Remember to take your efforts offline. Attend industry events to build your network, and let your results speak for themselves through word-of-mouth marketing. Also, don’t forget your business cards! 

Procrastination

The world of self-employment is no place for procrastinators. In order to seek and secure work, you must be a self-starter. There’s also no boss to delegate tasks to you. So, if you’re not finding and doing your own work, you’re going to wash out. And although taking a creative break can be good, if you don’t meet the client’s needs, they’ll most likely move on to the next person.

Avoid procrastination by addressing the root of why you’re procrastinating. If it’s fear of failure, remember that you’re already failing by avoiding the work. Instead, be successful by actually starting it. If you’ve landed a job that is bigger than your skillset, take some time to broaden your skillset. That will give you the confidence you need to proceed.

Poor Prioritizing

Getting used to being your own boss can be tricky. You’re on no one else’s schedule except your own, so it’s understandable that you may first gravitate toward activities that are not essential to work. But this gravitation is why many people fail; they don’t prioritize.

The longer you put off your work, the less energy you’ll have when you most need it, and the worse your work quality will be. If you want your work to be sustainable and successful, it’s essential to keep a schedule and put your responsibilities at the top of it.

Not Seeking Family/Household Support

Life for the self-employed need not be lonely, but it can feel very solitary at times. That’s why family or household support is worth seeking. It helps maintain your mental wellbeing, especially in times of crisis. You might not think you need it now, but the romanticism of the lone entrepreneur isn’t worth the possibility of harming your relationships through prolonged absences. If you’ll be working from home, make sure everyone can make the adjustment when it comes to things like personal space and scheduling.

Not Understanding What to Charge

For many, determining your worth is a delicate but brutally consequential aspect of your career. It’s not much different than the stress-inducing conversation that precedes asking your boss for a raise. But we all know that if we don’t set a certain bar for ourselves, no one else will.

So, recognize what goes into accurately pricing yourself. If you’re new to the game, charging a lower rate than the competition can be a great way to build a client base. If you’re a seasoned pro, then charge like one. If you’ve been working with a company for a reasonable amount of time, you can begin to raise your rates. Also consider the size of the company you are doing work for, as well as the budgets of their individual projects.

Being Financially Disorganized

It may be hard to understand at times, but for most self-employed people having the books in order gets harder the more successful you become. Think about it. It’s easy to keep track of income and expenses when you are just starting out with a few clients. But as things begin to pick up, your accounting becomes something you do late at night when all your real work is done.

This can spell disaster when you stop paying attention to the expenses and costs of doing business. When you don’t have a clear picture of your financial health, you won’t know when you’re in trouble. Don’t let your finances get out ofcontrol, even if it means outsourcing the work to an expert.

Failing to Pay Quarterly Taxes

Speaking of expenses, many self-employed people overlook the tax situation that comes along with working for yourself. According to the IRS Self-Employed Individuals Tax Center, “As a self-employed individual, generally you are required to file an annual return and pay estimated tax quarterly.”

If you ignore the quarterly requirement and owe more than $1,000 in taxes at the end of the year, you may face fines and penalties. Though some people opt to pay the penalties come April 15 to hold on to precious revenue, it’s best to pay your estimated quarterly taxes via Form 1040-ES. As good as it may sound to hang on to the money now, it’s a lot more lucrative to not be forced into spending more than you would have had to later.

Starting and maintaining a self-employed career is like owning a business. Though it can afford you many freedoms, you will also face more demands. You will be your own C-suite employee of every stripe. But if you are prepared for what’s to come—including potential hiccups—then your chances of surviving by practicing your true vocation will drastically increase.

Sean Bradley

10 Truths We Forget Too Easily

It’s surprising how easy it is to lose sight of the important things in life. Busy schedules and weekly routines have a tendency to put the brain on autopilot.

Some of life’s essential truths need repeating. Keep this list handy and give it a read any time you need a boost.

1. Being Busy Does Not Equal Being Productive

Look at everyone around you. They all seem so busy—running from meeting to meeting and firing off emails. Yet how many of them are really producing, really succeeding at a high level?

Success doesn’t come from movement and activity. It comes from focus—from ensuring that your time is used efficiently and productively.

You get the same number of hours in the day as everyone else. Use yours wisely. After all, you’re the product of your output, not your effort. Make certain your efforts are dedicated to tasks that get results.

Related: How Successful People Stay Productive and In Control

2. Great Success Is Often Preceded By Failure

You will never experience true success until you learn to embrace failure. Your mistakes pave the way for you to succeed by revealing when you’re on the wrong path.

The biggest breakthroughs typically come when you’re feeling the most frustrated and the most stuck. It’s this frustration that forces you to think differently, to look outside the box and see the solution that you’ve been missing.

Success takes patience and the ability to maintain a good attitude even while suffering for what you believe in.

3. Fear Is the No. 1 Source of Regret

When it’s all said and done, you will lament the chances you didn’t take far more than you will your failures. Don’t be afraid to take risks.

I often hear people say, “What’s the worst thing that can happen to you? Will it kill you?” Yet, death isn’t the worst thing that can happen to you.

The worst thing that can happen to you is allowing yourself to die inside while you’re still alive.

4. Your Self-Worth Must Come From Within

When your sense of pleasure and satisfaction are derived from comparing yourself to others, you are no longer the master of your own destiny. When you feel good about something that you’ve done, don’t allow anyone’s opinions or accomplishments to take that away from you.

While it’s impossible to turn off your reactions to what others think of you, you don’t have to compare yourself to others, and you can always take people’s opinions with a grain of salt. That way, no matter what other people are thinking or doing, your self-worth comes from within. Regardless of what people think of you at any particular moment, one thing is certain—you’re never as good or bad as they say you are.

5. You're Only as Good as Those You Associate With

You should strive to surround yourself with people who inspire you, people who make you want to be better. And you probably do. But what about the people who drag you down? Why do you allow them to be a part of your life?

Anyone who makes you feel worthless, anxious, or uninspired is wasting your time and, quite possibly, making you more like them. Life is too short to associate with people like this. Cut them loose.

6. Life Is Short

None of us are guaranteed a tomorrow. Yet, when someone dies unexpectedly it causes us to take stock of our own life: what’s really important, how we spend our time, and how we treat other people.

Loss is a raw, visceral reminder of the frailty of life. It shouldn’t be.

Remind yourself every morning when you wake up that each day is a gift and you’re bound to make the most of the blessing you’ve been given. The moment you start acting like life is a blessing is the moment it will start acting like one.

After all, a great day begins with a great mindset.

Related: Why Leaders Lack Emotional Intelligence

7. You Don't Have to Wait for an Apology to Forgive

Life goes a lot smoother once you let go of grudges and forgive even those who never said they were sorry. Grudges let negative events from your past ruin today’s happiness. Hate and anger are emotional parasites that destroy your joy in life.

The negative emotions that come with holding on to a grudge create a stress response in your body, and holding on to stress can have devastating health consequences. Researchers at Emory University have shown that holding on to stress contributes to high blood pressure and heart disease.

When you forgive someone, it doesn’t condone their actions; it simply frees you from being their eternal victim.

8. You're Living the Life You've Created

You are not a victim of circumstance. No one can force you to make decisions and take actions that run contrary to your values and aspirations.

The circumstances you’re living in today are your own—you created them. Likewise, your future is entirely up to you. If you’re feeling stuck, it’s probably because you’re afraid to take the risks necessary to achieve your goals and live your dreams.

When it’s time to take action, remember that it’s always better to be at the bottom of the ladder you want to climb than at the top of one you don’t.

9. Live in the Moment

You can’t reach your full potential until you learn to live your life in the present.

No amount of guilt can change the past, and no amount of anxiety can change the future. It’s impossible to be happy if you’re constantly somewhere else, unable to fully embrace the reality (good or bad) of this very moment.

To help yourself live in the moment, you must do two things:

1. Accept your past. If you don’t make peace with your past, it will never leave you and, in doing so, it will create your future.
2. Accept the uncertainty of the future. Worry has no place in the here and now. As Mark Twain once said, “Worrying is like paying a debt you don’t owe.”

10. Change Is Inevitable -- Embrace It

Only when you embrace change can you find the good in it. You need to have an open mind and open arms if you’re going to recognize, and capitalize on, the opportunities that change creates.

You’re bound to fail when you keep doing the same things you always have in the hope that ignoring change will make it go away.

After all, the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.

Life doesn’t stop for anyone. When things are going well, appreciate them and enjoy them, as they are bound to change. If you are always searching for something more, something better, that you think is going to make you happy, you’ll never be present enough to enjoy the great moments before they’re gone.

A version of this article first appeared on TalentSmart.com.

Related: 13 Habits of Exceptionally Likable People

Travis Bradberry